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For Games Ranked 21–18
21.
Zalag: Glustu
by
MorpheusKitami
Release Type:
Original Release
Fuzzy Description:
Part 5 of the Complicated Gallery series, where lost souls visit a gallery to reclaim something valuable of some sort. In this fifth part, a fifth lost soul must enter the gallery to accomplish a goal. Yes, this description is vague. That’s why it’s called “fuzzy.”
Average Score:
Total Voters:
Highest Rating:
6
Lowest Rating:
1
Achievements
Achievement
The Continuing Saga
–Zalag: Glustu is the fifth episode in The Complicated Gallery series.
Achievement
A Museum of Horrors
-Game takes place in a museum filled with grim subject matter.
Achievement
Retroactive Requirement
-In order to progress to the most recent episode of The Complicated Gallery, the player has to play through earlier episodes.
Achievement
Digital Lobby
-The gallery portion of the The Complicated Gallery acts as a hub or lobby to access previous episodes from the series. This makes excellent use of the “run game” feature recently added to Hamsterspeak, which allows for one game to close out and load up another.
Achievement
Mercifully Short
-Each part leading to the final episode is reasonably short.
Achievement
Challenged Heart
–Zalag: Glustu calls up the usual questions of whether it fits the contest. This award is a cousin to “Rebel Heart,” which is given to any game that forces a change to the rules. Whether the challenge is justified is debatable. Previous episodes in its parent game, The Complicated Gallery, satisfy the basic rules just fine. Contest entry Px, while not officially given this award, is another contender for it.
Achievement
The Continuing Saga
–Zalag: Glustu is the fifth episode in The Complicated Gallery series.
Achievement
Retroactive Requirement
-In order to progress to the most recent episode of The Complicated Gallery, the player has to play through earlier episodes.
Achievement
Mercifully Short
-Each part leading to the final episode is reasonably short.
Achievement
A Museum of Horrors
-Game takes place in a museum filled with grim subject matter.
Achievement
Digital Lobby
-The gallery portion of the The Complicated Gallery acts as a hub or lobby to access previous episodes from the series. This makes excellent use of the “run game” feature recently added to Hamsterspeak, which allows for one game to close out and load up another.
Achievement
Challenged Heart
–Zalag: Glustu calls up the usual questions of whether it fits the contest. This award is a cousin to “Rebel Heart,” which is given to any game that forces a change to the rules. Whether the challenge is justified is debatable. Previous episodes in its parent game, The Complicated Gallery, satisfy the basic rules just fine. Contest entry Px, while not officially given this award, is another contender for it.
Audience Consensus:
Tries to make a point about something, but whatever that point is seems unclear to most players. Relies on the previous parts to provide some understanding on what’s going on. Fortunately, those parts are accessible within the main game.
20.
Hero: Adventure in Animal Kingdom
by
TheCrimsonDM
Release Type:
Original Release
Fuzzy Description:
Pick a hero, any hero. Then send that hero into the fields to fight animals because heroes fight animals. A lot. That’s how it works. Use the frog as your guide.
Average Score:
Total Voters:
Highest Rating:
5
Lowest Rating:
2
Achievements
Achievement
Waist Level Champion
-A Heart of the OHR staple award given to a game that fails to receive a vote higher than 5. This is the top award given to below-average games. Similar awards include “Below the Knees Champion,” previously given to Dark Planet (2016), which caps at 3, and “Below the Belt Champion,” previously given to Grapnes 2: Kepnalcide (2016), which caps at 4. The lowest award, “Below the Ankles Champion,” which caps at 2, has not yet been awarded, but disqualified entry Hanu in Hell was well on its way to receiving it had it stayed in the contest.
Achievement
Been There, Done That
-Doesn’t do anything new. Sticks very much to the conventions and style of the traditional “newbie” OHR RPG.
Achievement
Newbie Explosion
-One of four games from TheCrimsonDM that were designed in his newbie years but not released until 2018. This game was made in 2011 and shares the award with One Pirate: Adventure in the Crystal Cave, One Pirate: Adventure in Summer Island, and My Little Pony: Trixie’s Adventure on the Rock Farm.
Achievement
No Relation to the Newbie Sensation
-The Heart of the OHR saw another newbie game called Hero back in 2010. This Hero is not from that franchise.
Achievement
Crimson Second Strike
-The second in a tide of TheCrimsonDM’s newly surfaced starter games. This was the lowest scoring entry, however, so the first will be listed later. Note: This rank is based on TheCrimsonDM’s game creation order, not release order. If going by release order, than Hero: Adventure in Animal Kingdom would be the “End of the Crimson Tide.”
Achievement
Winner of the Northwest Award
-A new staple award for the lowest rated game to begin in the upper left corner of the map.
Achievement
Waist Level Champion
-A Heart of the OHR staple award given to a game that fails to receive a vote higher than 5. This is the top award given to below-average games. Similar awards include “Below the Knees Champion,” previously given to Dark Planet (2016), which caps at 3, and “Below the Belt Champion,” previously given to Grapnes 2: Kepnalcide (2016), which caps at 4. The lowest award, “Below the Ankles Champion,” which caps at 2, has not yet been awarded, but disqualified entry Hanu in Hell was well on its way to receiving it had it stayed in the contest.
Achievement
Newbie Explosion
-One of four games from TheCrimsonDM that were designed in his newbie years but not released until 2018. This game was made in 2011 and shares the award with One Pirate: Adventure in the Crystal Cave, One Pirate: Adventure in Summer Island, and My Little Pony: Trixie’s Adventure on the Rock Farm.
Achievement
Crimson Second Strike
-The second in a tide of TheCrimsonDM’s newly surfaced starter games. This was the lowest scoring entry, however, so the first will be listed later. Note: This rank is based on TheCrimsonDM’s game creation order, not release order. If going by release order, than Hero: Adventure in Animal Kingdom would be the “End of the Crimson Tide.”
Achievement
Been There, Done That
-Doesn’t do anything new. Sticks very much to the conventions and style of the traditional “newbie” OHR RPG.
Achievement
No Relation to the Newbie Sensation
-The Heart of the OHR saw another newbie game called Hero back in 2010. This Hero is not from that franchise.
Achievement
Winner of the Northwest Award
-A new staple award for the lowest rated game to begin in the upper left corner of the map.
Audience Consensus:
Terrible graphics, sketchy wallmaps, endless battles, blob-like attacks, good (probably ripped) music, and an incomprehensible storyline. Yep, all the best newbie conventions are here. It even starts in the upper left corner of the screen. And the dialogue? Oh, the amateur, poorly spelled dialogue. Classic. This game has it all.
19.
Arc Wars
by
MorpheusKitami
Release Type:
Original Release
Fuzzy Description:
In the year 2201, three female mech pilots go on a mission to destroy a three-legged destroyer in a wasteland vision of Earth, but then they are destroyed and torturous stuff soon follows.
Average Score:
Total Voters:
Highest Rating:
6
Lowest Rating:
1
Achievements
Achievement
Meta She’s Born with It
-The protagonist is thrown into Hell after losing to the first boss. The game itself then becomes hellish to play thanks to its numerous unpleasant design choices. Not sure if that was intentional.
Achievement
All You Need Is Kill
Edge of Tomorrow
Live. Die. Repeat.
-These are the three names given to Tom Cruise’s sci-fi classic Edge of Tomorrow (2014), a futuristic thriller that also has mechanized tankbots in it. The first name comes from the book the movie is based on, the second comes from the movie’s theatrical release, and the third comes from its DVD and Blu-ray release. Arc Wars gets this award for having three names: Arc War (in-game title and CUSTOM long name), Arc Wars (game page and marketing), and Skotos Dorchatus (second act game name and filename).
Achievement
Poisoned Heart
-A Heart of the OHR staple award given to any game that has harsh or offensive material and sours the family-friendly tone of the contest. Because Heart of the OHR doesn’t censor its entries, it tends to accept these types of games in spite of its material, but does so with reluctance. Previous winners include James Doppler’s…Adventure for the Mind (2014) and Sour City (2016). Zalag: Glustu is another contender for this award, but Arc Wars goes after it so much harder and therefore wins it.
Achievement
All You Need Is Kill
Edge of Tomorrow
Live. Die. Repeat
-These are the three names given to Tom Cruise’s sci-fi classic Edge of Tomorrow (2014), a futuristic thriller that also has mechanized tankbots in it. The first name comes from the book the movie is based on, the second comes from the movie’s theatrical release, and the third comes from its DVD and Blu-ray release. Arc Wars gets this award for having three names: Arc War (in-game title and CUSTOM long name), Arc Wars (game page and marketing), and Skotos Dorchatus (second act game name and filename).
Achievement
False Advertising
-The game’s page description says nothing about the real game underneath the mech war storyline.
Achievement
The Big Empty
-A Heart of the OHR staple award given to any game that has wide open expanses or long winding corridors that feature nothing. Previous winners include Illusions (2012), Mr. Triangle’s Adventure (2014), and Dragon Chaser (2016). Other contenders for this award include Dreamwalkers for its lack of interaction with NPCs and Hero: Adventure in Animal Kingdom for its generally empty fields, but Arc Wars wins it for not only having nothing to interact with and nothing to look at, but for also having a featureless nothing for large swaths of gaming real estate. This award was originally called “Most Expansive Nothing” (in 2012).
Achievement
All You Need Is Kill
Edge of Tomorrow
Live. Die. Repeat.
-These are the three names given to Tom Cruise’s sci-fi classic Edge of Tomorrow (2014), a futuristic thriller that also has mechanized tankbots in it. The first name comes from the book the movie is based on, the second comes from the movie’s theatrical release, and the third comes from its DVD and Blu-ray release. Arc Wars gets this award for having three names: Arc War (in-game title and CUSTOM long name), Arc Wars (game page and marketing), and Skotos Dorchatus (second act game name and filename).
Achievement
Meta She’s Born with It
-The protagonist is thrown into Hell after losing to the first boss. The game itself then becomes hellish to play thanks to its numerous unpleasant design choices. Not sure if that was intentional.
Achievement
Poisoned Heart
-A Heart of the OHR staple award given to any game that has harsh or offensive material and sours the family-friendly tone of the contest. Because Heart of the OHR doesn’t censor its entries, it tends to accept these types of games in spite of its material, but does so with reluctance. Previous winners include James Doppler’s…Adventure for the Mind (2014) and Sour City (2016). Zalag: Glustu is another contender for this award, but Arc Wars goes after it so much harder and therefore wins it.
Achievement
The Big Empty
-A Heart of the OHR staple award given to any game that has wide open expanses or long winding corridors that feature nothing. Previous winners include Illusions (2012), Mr. Triangle’s Adventure (2014), and Dragon Chaser (2016). Other contenders for this award include Dreamwalkers for its lack of interaction with NPCs and Hero: Adventure in Animal Kingdom for its generally empty fields, but Arc Wars wins it for not only having nothing to interact with and nothing to look at, but for also having a featureless nothing for large swaths of gaming real estate. This award was originally called “Most Expansive Nothing” (in 2012).
Achievement
All You Need Is Kill
-These are the three names given to Tom Cruise’s sci-fi classic Edge of Tomorrow (2014), a futuristic thriller that also has mechanized tankbots in it. The first name comes from the book the movie is based on, the second comes from the movie’s theatrical release, and the third comes from its DVD and Blu-ray release. Arc Wars gets this award for having three names: Arc War (in-game title and CUSTOM long name), Arc Wars (game page and marketing), and Skotos Dorchatus (second act game name and filename).
Achievement
Edge of Tomorrow
-See “All You Need Is Kill.”
Achievement
Live. Die. Repeat.
-See “All You Need Is Kill.”
Achievement
False Advertising
-The game’s page description says nothing about the real game underneath the mech war storyline.
Audience Consensus:
The writing is competent, but nearly every other design choice is poor. The graphics are hardly more than solid colored blocks. Navigating the tight, long, winding halls of the underworld is a chore. Battles are terribly slow and offer no incentive to fight. The dialogue, while clear, is often vulgar and at times disturbing. Given the environment, this makes sense, but it doesn’t make the game the least bit fun to play (maybe that’s the point?). Even the game’s page description is off, as it fails to mention what the game is really about. Seems more like a commentary than a game.
18.
My Little Pony: Trixie’s Adventure on the Rock Farm
by
TheCrimsonDM
Release Type:
Original Release
Fuzzy Description:
A young, vain pony is sent on a mission to collect a sapphire for the rock farm’s stable elder (stable instead of a town because the characters are horses—get it?). But, as it turns out, her adventure to collect rocks is not so straightforward, and her journey will take her well beyond the cave where the sapphire is contained (but not that well beyond—just two more maps beyond) to locate the missing Marble (another pony) and bring order back to the farm. Based on an episode from My Little Pony, the cartoon.
Average Score:
Total Voters:
Highest Rating:
5
Lowest Rating:
2
Achievements
Achievement
Waist Level Runner-up
-Variation of the staple “Waist Level Champion,” given to games that fail to receive a score higher than 5. This is the second ranked “Waist Level Champion,” according to its higher total average over the lowest overall-ranked game that shares the award.
Achievement
Director’s Commentary
-Finishing My Little Pony: Trixie’s Adventure on the Rock Farm will lead the player to a special ending where he or she can interact with various NPCs who trigger inspirational commentaries about their character origins. This convention is a staple to TheCrimsonDM’s games, as Masks: 15 Pages does something similar.
Achievement
Diva and Conqueror
-Trixie is full of herself. Not much else to say about that.
Achievement
Newbie Explosion
-One of four games from TheCrimsonDM that were designed in his newbie years but not released until 2018. This game was made in 2011 and shares the award with One Pirate: Adventure in the Crystal Cave, One Pirate: Adventure in Summer Island, and Hero: Adventure in Animal Kingdom.
Achievement
Shameless Fannery
-Not only is My Little Pony: Trixie’s Adventure on the Rock Farm a fan game about My Little Pony, but apparently it apes its content from an actual episode from the cartoon. That’s fandom.
Achievement
Those Poor Rocks
-Every time Trixie attacks a rock with her pickaxe, the poor, helpless, motionless rock screams in pain, but it can’t fight back. Must be a metaphor for something.
Achievement
Crimson Third Strike
-The third in a tide of TheCrimsonDM’s newly surfaced starter games. It was released before Hero: Adventure in Animal Kingdom, but made after. Most likely. It’s actually unclear when this game was made. These “Crimson” achievements are actually suspicious. They try to rate according to TheCrimsonDM’s creation order rather than release order. If going by release order, then My Little Pony: Trixie’s Adventure on the Rock Farm would be the “Crimson Second Strike.”
Achievement
Cult of Personality
-Each character in My Little Pony: Trixie’s Adventure on the Rock Farm has his or her own distinct personality, and the dialogue does a decent job sticking to that personality. For example, Trixie speaks in the third person and likes to insult her cousin Limestone every chance she gets. This may be one of the game’s highlights.
Achievement
Wild Wild West Award
-Trixie’s adventure spans in each direction from the rock farm, but all roads lead back to the same place. Achievement name comes from the song “Wild Wild West” by The Escape Club, based on its lyrics. The fact that the game is about horses on a rock farm and based on an 80’s intellectual property is just bonus.
Achievement
Waist Level Runner-up
-Variation of the staple “Waist Level Champion,” given to games that fail to receive a score higher than 5. This is the second ranked “Waist Level Champion,” according to its higher total average over the lowest overall-ranked game that shares the award.
Achievement
Newbie Explosion
-One of four games from TheCrimsonDM that were designed in his newbie years but not released until 2018. This game was made in 2011 and shares the award with One Pirate: Adventure in the Crystal Cave, One Pirate: Adventure in Summer Island, and Hero: Adventure in Animal Kingdom.
Achievement
Crimson Third Strike
-The third in a tide of TheCrimsonDM’s newly surfaced starter games. It was released before Hero: Adventure in Animal Kingdom, but made after. Most likely. It’s actually unclear when this game was made. These “Crimson” achievements are actually suspicious. They try to rate according to TheCrimsonDM’s creation order rather than release order. If going by release order, then My Little Pony: Trixie’s Adventure on the Rock Farm would be the “Crimson Second Strike.”
Achievement
Director’s Commentary
-Finishing My Little Pony: Trixie’s Adventure on the Rock Farm will lead the player to a special ending where he or she can interact with various NPCs who trigger inspirational commentaries about their character origins. This convention is a staple to TheCrimsonDM’s games, as Masks: 15 Pages does something similar.
Achievement
Shameless Fannery
-Not only is My Little Pony: Trixie’s Adventure on the Rock Farm a fan game about My Little Pony, but apparently it apes its content from an actual episode from the cartoon. That’s fandom.
Achievement
Cult of Personality
-Each character in My Little Pony: Trixie’s Adventure on the Rock Farm has his or her own distinct personality, and the dialogue does a decent job sticking to that personality. For example, Trixie speaks in the third person and likes to insult her cousin Limestone every chance she gets. This may be one of the game’s highlights.
Achievement
Diva and Conqueror
-Trixie is full of herself. Not much else to say about that.
Achievement
Those Poor Rocks
-Every time Trixie attacks a rock with her pickaxe, the poor, helpless, motionless rock screams in pain, but it can’t fight back. Must be a metaphor for something.
Achievement
Wild Wild West Award
-Trixie’s adventure spans in each direction from the rock farm, but all roads lead back to the same place. Achievement name comes from the song “Wild Wild West” by The Escape Club, based on its lyrics. The fact that the game is about horses on a rock farm and based on an 80’s intellectual property is just bonus.
Audience Consensus:
More of the same from TheCrimsonDM, but with more competent writing than previous entries and has the possibility for a second ending. Graphics are also better than the other games, but still ultimately harmless. Neither good nor bad, it’s basically just fine.
